June Etsy

I am going to try to feature a artist/crafter from Etsy every month. To start out I am featuring Dirty Sanchez. Though I have not had the opportunity to purchase for this shop yet I have indulged in the amazing humor it provides. If I need a lift I know where to go and, from the reviews, if I need a good scrub I think I should stop by this place as well. Practically everything is funny in this shop. It starts with the opening statement to the descriptions even the policies. Here is one that had me rolling on the floor with laughter. Enjoy!


hay

when my son was about four years old, he came home from preschool one day, and announced – in response to my yelling “hey!” at him, presumably to stop him from doing something reckless like sticking his finger in an electrical socket, or the cat’s butt – that “hay is for whores.” i was, as you might imagine, appalled. as any good mother would, though, i held my composure and gently corrected him: “sweetie,” i said, “it’s not ‘whores.’ it’s ‘harlots,’ or ‘streetwalkers.’” to commemorate those early days of sweet innocence, i’ve created the hay soap. made with pure olive oil, creamy mango butter, and the usual lineup of other good stuff, it’s scented with a warm blend of dried hay and sweet honey. and i’m sure it’s like, way nicer than anything the average hooker is washing up with. so at least you’ve got that going for you. ___________________________________________________

each bar is hand-cut using my cheap yet superlatively, painfully sharp dollar store butcher knife. bars are all approximately 5 ounces, but please allow for slight variations.

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ingredients: distilled water, coconut oil, palm oil, mango butter, avocado oil, olive oil, sodium hydroxide, castor oil, fragrance, white clay, beeswax, color.